Help for New and Learning Dominants

New to Dominance as part of a D/s relationship? Trying to be a better Dominant for your partner?

Use the links below to learn more about what it can mean to be a Dominant — for yourself and for your relationship.

Understanding Dominance

Dominance means something different to everyone. Ultimately, consent and communication are the only thing required. But if you find yourself wondering what it even means to be dominant, these resources can help.

What is Dominance? | Audio version

The Difference Between a Dom and a Top (and a sub and a bottom)

7 Things Good Dominants Do | Audio version

13 Things New Dominants Need to Know | Audio version

Types of Dominants

There’s no single “type” of Dominant, and you don’t have to follow a script or fit a specific mold. But to figure out your style, these resources may help. We also recommend using our resources page to find other sites, channels, and content that can help you figure out what type of Dominant you are or want to be.

What Does a Good Dominant Look Like? (2015 episode) | Revisiting “Good Doms” (2021 episode)

What Kind of Dominant Do You Want to Be?

Why Knowing Yourself Matters in Power Exchange

Kinky Titles are Different for All of Us

Understanding the Caregiver/little Dynamic

Hard Doms vs Soft Doms

Why Patience is Important in D/s

Leadership Styles and Power Exchange

Why Dominants Need to Be Consistent

6 Reasons Why Being Consistent Matters in D/s

Things You Need to Know as a Dominant

Let’s be real…there’s a lot you’re going to need to know as a Dominant in a D/s relationship. This isn’t everything, but it includes the things we think are extremely important. Especially if you want to build power exchange relationships that are good for everyone involved.

How to Know When You Have Consent

How to Be a Better Communicator

Safety in BDSM

What is Your BDSM Safety Philosophy?

Safeword Tips

Understanding Discipline and Punishment

Bad Behavior and Red Flags from Submissives

Signs and Red Flags of a Bad Dominant

Dom Drop and Aftercare

6 Things That Aren’t Topping From the Bottom

To listen to, read, or watch all of our content focused on Dominants, click this link.

Is this everything there is to know about being a Dominant in a D/s relationship? Of course not. The path you’re on is (cringy as it sounds) a journey. We all have to start somewhere and then we have to keep going and keep learning. Consider this only the first step on what (we hope) is a lifelong practice and journey into a satisfying kink life.