Stuff We Love

We use a lot of products in our kinky fuckery, to run the Loving BDSM website podcast, and as two people living and loving the BDSM life. So we thought it would be handy to put them all in one list. Everything here is something we’ve tried or experienced personally. Some links will be affiliate links. If you click the link and make a purchase, we make a small commission. You don’t pay any more than usual (sometimes you pay less), and you help support the blog, podcast, and our coffee addiction.


Obviously we love our BDSM toys, especially spanking and bondage gear. Some of our favorite toys are random things we’ve found at shops, clubs, or around the house. But some items are things we’ve received or bought from very different shops online. Here are the ones we love the most.

Lodbrock — BDSM restraint and impact play

My Nawashi — Bondage rope

Bear-Things — Cuffs, collars, and other leather pieces

Cane-iac — Delrin canes, paddles, and other impact play toys

Kink Crate — Subscription service filled with different kink toys every month!

Kinky Cloth (Use code KINKYKAYLA to save 25 percent!) — Clothing, toys, and other kinky gear that’s fun and light-hearted with a Caregiver/little twist

Oxyd Creations — Sustainable BDSM gear including collars, cuffs, harnesses, and more made from recycled bicycle rubber

Sex Toys

We’ve been fortunate to get to try all kinds of sex toys over the past several years. Not everything makes our list of favorites, though. Some are average, and some are terrible. These are toys and/or the companies that we absolutely love — that aren’t already listed under BDSM gear!

Hot Octopuss — We love everything they make including the Pulse III Duo, the Atom, the Atom Plus, and the Queen Bee

The Original Magic Wand — great for orgasm play and big orgasms

Tyler by Svakom — It’s a cock ring that buzzes for the wearer OR your partner

Crescendo by Mystery Vibe — a bendable vibrator for anyone and everyone

Ambit Effulgence — a beautiful dildo from Godemiche


The best porn isn’t the stuff you find for free on PornHub or other tube sites. It’s the stuff that’s made with heart and with consent, sex positivity, inclusivity, and diversity.


Dreams of Spanking

Erotic Films


You can find a few books we recommend for people who want to learn more about BDSM on our resources page. Here we’ve listed books that we enjoyed whether as an educational resource or just because it was erotic and entertaining. And as you can see…we’re definitely readers.

BDSM Journal by Mona Darling • Check out our review

How to Be a Happy and Healthy Submissive by Kate Kinsey

When Someone You Love is Kinky by Dossie Easton

Alpha’s Temptation by Renee Rose and Lee Savino

The Siren by Tiffany Reisz

Girl on the Net: How a Bad Girl Fell in Love

A Life Less Monogamous by Cooper S. Beckett

Approaching the Swingularity by Cooper S. Beckett

Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer by Oleander Plume

The Gor Series by John Norman

Two Knotty Boys Showing You the Ropes

I Am a Cuckquean by Angela Reneau

Shibari You Can Use and More Shibari You Can Use by Lee Harrington

Age of Discovery by Theo Black

Website Stuff

It takes a lot to run a podcast and website. Here are some of the things we use because they work well and we love them.

Blubrry Podcast Hosting — use code KaylaLords and get one month free

Stressfree Web Hosting

Canva — for graphic creations

Audio-Technica Microphone

Will this list change and grow over time? Absolutely! We love discovering new sexy, kinky, interesting, useful, and fun things, and we definitely love sharing them with you.