About us

WHAT DO WE DO ?

We help kinksters like you have happy, healthy power exchange relationships. No matter how you define BDSM and no matter what kind of kinky relationship you want, we’re here to help!

WHO ARE WE ?

We are John Brownstone (the Dom) and Kayla Lords (the sub), a married D/s couple, sharing our thoughts, feelings, and experiences on this thing we call BDSM.

Grow and Learn With Us!

Listen

In our weekly podcast, we discuss all aspects of how to have a happy, healthy power exchange relationship.

Watch

You can watch the podcast during a weekly live stream, plus learn more about BDSM, check out product reviews, and more!

Join

We believe in having a community to help you grow and to offer support on this BDSM journey. Join our kinky community on Patreon!

banner with Loving BDSM logos and text extra help, info, and fun stuff

Feel like a total noob? Don’t know what you don’t know? We offer resources for new kinksters here on our site and a list of resources you can find around the internet. Start with D/s for Beginners and then check out our BDSM resource page.

Still trying to figure out how you feel about D/s, power exchange, and BDSM? Get the 30 Days of D/s workbook to help you think about BDSM in a more manageable way and figure out what YOU want. Buy it here.

Do you like BDSM toys, kinky gear, and fun swag? You can shop John Brownstone’s kinky store at The Kinkery or at the Loving BDSM Etsy shop!

Got a kinky question about D/s relationships, the BDSM community, or something else you’d like to know more about? Ask your question here and it could be answered in a future podcast episode!

Check out the Loving BDSM Blog

We share tips and how-tos, answer BDSM questions, offer our thoughts and insight, share product reviews, and publish the show notes for every podcast episode on our blog! Take a look!

Consent is necessary for sexual contact but also in the non-sexual moments in life

Non-Sexual Moments of Consent

[Content warning: We allude to or directly mention sexual assault, violence, and other situations that occur when consent is not given or gained. We do not describe any specific acts. Protect yourself as you...

Video review of a BDSM journal

Product Review: BDSM Journal

For many people, myself included, writing down our thoughts is a way to not only process them but also to get them out of our head. It gets loud in a crowded and sometimes...

results are in for Loving BDSM survey and we've made plans for 2018

Survey Results and Plans for 2018

In what was definitely a spur-of-the-moment decision, we put out a survey at the end of 2017 to help us figure out what to do for 2018. We wanted to know if our ideas...

anal sex hints, tips, and tricks

Anal Sex Basics and Beyond

When you come back from a vacation what’s the first thing you’re ready to talk about? If it’s “anal sex” then you’re living your best life which means I must be, too. We’re in...