About us

WHAT DO WE DO ?

We help kinksters like you have happy, healthy power exchange relationships. No matter how you define BDSM and no matter what kind of kinky relationship you want, we’re here to help!

WHO ARE WE ?

We are John Brownstone (the Dom) and Kayla Lords (the sub), a married D/s couple, sharing our thoughts, feelings, and experiences on this thing we call BDSM.

Grow and Learn With Us!

Listen

In our weekly podcast, we discuss all aspects of how to have a happy, healthy power exchange relationship.

Watch

You can watch the podcast during a weekly live stream, plus learn more about BDSM, check out product reviews, and more!

Join

We believe in having a community to help you grow and to offer support on this BDSM journey. Join our kinky community on Patreon!

banner with Loving BDSM logos and text extra help, info, and fun stuff

Feel like a total noob? Don’t know what you don’t know? We offer resources for new kinksters here on our site and a list of resources you can find around the internet. Start with D/s for Beginners and then check out our BDSM resource page.

Still trying to figure out how you feel about D/s, power exchange, and BDSM? Get the 30 Days of D/s workbook to help you think about BDSM in a more manageable way and figure out what YOU want. Buy it here.

Do you like BDSM toys, kinky gear, and fun swag? You can shop John Brownstone’s kinky store at The Kinkery or at the Loving BDSM Etsy shop!

Got a kinky question about D/s relationships, the BDSM community, or something else you’d like to know more about? Ask your question here and it could be answered in a future podcast episode!

Check out the Loving BDSM Blog

We share tips and how-tos, answer BDSM questions, offer our thoughts and insight, share product reviews, and publish the show notes for every podcast episode on our blog! Take a look!

episode 251 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Going to Bed Angry

Most of us have heard the cliched advice, “Never go to bed angry!” Everyone has their own opinion and experience with arguments in relationships, including those late-night disagreements. We try not to go to...

episode 250 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Why It’s a Journey

You’ve heard us call BDSM, power exchange, and the kink life a “journey.” And yes, it’s become cliche, but that doesn’t mean there’s not some truth to it. This week, we’re talking about why...

episode 249 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Being “Picky” About Your Partners

A conversation with a kinky friend of ours prompted this week’s topic. That person stayed in a crumbling relationship because they thought they were being “too picky.” We disagreed with that person completely. But...

episode 248 of the Loving BDSM podcast going over a BDSM checklist

Re-Doing a BDSM Checklist

It started as an offhand idea John Brownstone threw out right before Christmas, and then we ran with it. It’s been years since we did any BDSM checklists, so we recorded ourselves doing one...