About us

WHAT DO WE DO ?

We help kinksters like you have happy, healthy power exchange relationships. No matter how you define BDSM and no matter what kind of kinky relationship you want, we’re here to help!

WHO ARE WE ?

We are John Brownstone (the Dom) and Kayla Lords (the sub), a married D/s couple, sharing our thoughts, feelings, and experiences on this thing we call BDSM.

Grow and Learn With Us!

Listen

In our weekly podcast, we discuss all aspects of how to have a happy, healthy power exchange relationship.

Watch

You can watch the podcast during a weekly live stream, plus learn more about BDSM, check out product reviews, and more!

Join

We believe in having a community to help you grow and to offer support on this BDSM journey. Join our kinky community on Patreon!

banner with Loving BDSM logos and text extra help, info, and fun stuff

Feel like a total noob? Don’t know what you don’t know? We offer resources for new kinksters here on our site and a list of resources you can find around the internet. Start with D/s for Beginners and then check out our BDSM resource page.

Still trying to figure out how you feel about D/s, power exchange, and BDSM? Get the 30 Days of D/s workbook to help you think about BDSM in a more manageable way and figure out what YOU want. Buy it here.

Do you like BDSM toys, kinky gear, and fun swag? You can shop John Brownstone’s kinky store at The Kinkery or at the Loving BDSM Etsy shop!

Got a kinky question about D/s relationships, the BDSM community, or something else you’d like to know more about? Ask your question here and it could be answered in a future podcast episode!

Check out the Loving BDSM Blog

We share tips and how-tos, answer BDSM questions, offer our thoughts and insight, share product reviews, and publish the show notes for every podcast episode on our blog! Take a look!

episode 359 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Most “Popular” Kinks and Fetishes

Pay attention to the air quotes because in this conversation, we had serious questions about this list. Joy Love Dolls compiled a list of the “most popular” kinks and fetishes using Google search data,...

episode 358 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Our Kink Life on OnlyFans

Back in January we talked about how we’d started an OnlyFans page for our kinky fuckery and mentioned we might do a six-month update. Well, here it is! In this episode: Consider this episode...

episode 357 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Are D/s Relationships 50/50?

The real question is: Should D/s relationships be 50/50? We have definite opinions on this one. In this episode: Subscribe to our weekly newsletter and get a free BDSM checklist! This week’s episode was...

episode 356 of the Loving BDSM podcast

How D/s Has Improved Our Lives

In this week’s podcast episode, we’re focusing on the positive and looking at how kink and power exchange have improved our lives – both as individuals and as a couple. In this episode: We...

episode 355 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Bonus Section Episode

We thought this was a “No thoughts, just vibes” kind of episode – because we didn’t have the energy to focus on a topic and there’s just been a lot going on lately. And...

episode 354 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Mental Load in Power Exchange

This week, we’re talking about the mental load each partner carries in power exchange. It’s a topic that touches on a lot of previous conversations: decision fatigue, burnout, the need for self-care, and on...