How to Deal with Drama in the BDSM Community

8 Responses

  1. Pixie says:

    I can tell you how much I relate to this ! I’ could of done with this in my nila life a few years back lol

    I have seen so much drama , on so many levels over the years. Lol is it a point to say I have been in to the fetish from the tender age of 19 and I’m now 37. I actively stayed away from clubs and Munches over the last 5 years, as things with my ex had got to a point of being the source of drama. I could not stand the disapproving looks and hushed whispers . Now I chose not to go to clubs as I still have major social anxiety, but we are looking at low key munches next year! My saving grace has been on line kink and the people that come with it. I have never met more excepting people! Some times it can feel a little cliquey and the are a few brown nosed people , but I’m learning to just be me and let it go over my head.

    The thing I do now I that is different is I will call people out , if I feel myself! One of the girls or someone new is being bullied in some way. Cos , well that is just not right or fare !

    • Kayla Lords says:

      I can’t wait to hear about your adventures at the munches next year. But online communities can definitely be an excellent replacement, though, you’re right – the same kinds of people with the same kind of drama will be there, too.

  2. TheLittlePrincess says:

    I love this article. Most of the interactions I have with fellow kinksters is online, because, well, I live in a kink desert of sorts. I’ve not really seen a lot of drama on FetLife, but I’ve definitely seen it in groups I was in on Facebook. I stay away from, or leave, those kinds of situations. 🙂 I hate drama.

  3. SexyKitten707 says:

    Loved your podcast on this topic!! I was pleased to find this to help sort through some issues I was having with a member of our kink community who dominates the munch and everyone’s conversation when they are there. This podcast gives me and my dom ideas of how to deal. It also brought a great discussion topic. Thank you again Kayla.

    • Kayla Lords says:

      So glad we could help! Hopefully youcan deal with that person because that kind of behavior is no fair to the rest of you at the munch.

  1. October 20, 2017

    […] How to Deal with Drama in the BDSM Community […]

  2. July 10, 2019

    […] when you were new (assuming you’re not). And treat people with kindness and respect — until they give you a reason not to. That’s probably all any of us can […]

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