About us

WHAT DO WE DO ?

We help kinksters like you have happy, healthy power exchange relationships. No matter how you define BDSM and no matter what kind of kinky relationship you want, we’re here to help!

WHO ARE WE ?

We are John Brownstone (the Dom) and Kayla Lords (the sub), a married D/s couple, sharing our thoughts, feelings, and experiences on this thing we call BDSM.

Grow and Learn With Us!

Listen

In our weekly podcast, we discuss all aspects of how to have a happy, healthy power exchange relationship.

Watch

You can watch the podcast during a weekly live stream, plus learn more about BDSM, check out product reviews, and more!

Join

We believe in having a community to help you grow and to offer support on this BDSM journey. Join our kinky community on Patreon!

banner with Loving BDSM logos and text extra help, info, and fun stuff

Feel like a total noob? Don’t know what you don’t know? We offer resources for new kinksters here on our site and a list of resources you can find around the internet. Start with D/s for Beginners and then check out our BDSM resource page.

Still trying to figure out how you feel about D/s, power exchange, and BDSM? Get the 30 Days of D/s workbook to help you think about BDSM in a more manageable way and figure out what YOU want. Buy it here.

Do you like BDSM toys, kinky gear, and fun swag? You can shop John Brownstone’s kinky store at The Kinkery or at the Loving BDSM Etsy shop!

Got a kinky question about D/s relationships, the BDSM community, or something else you’d like to know more about? Ask your question here and it could be answered in a future podcast episode!

Check out the Loving BDSM Blog

We share tips and how-tos, answer BDSM questions, offer our thoughts and insight, share product reviews, and publish the show notes for every podcast episode on our blog! Take a look!

episode 209 of the Loving BDSM podcast discusses SAMs, brats, and sassy submissives

SAMs, Brats, and Sassy Submissives

How did it take us 200-plus episodes to FINALLY discuss smart-ass masochists (SAMs), brats, and sassy submissives? We don’t know either! But here we are! In this episode: Subscribe to our newsletter! What is...

episode 208 of the Loving BDSM podcast on codependency in D/s relationships

Codependency and D/s Relationships

Quick content note: While we do not go into details about abuse, trauma, or addiction, it does get mentioned in the episode a few times.  Several weeks ago we were tagged in a conversation...

5 tips for vetting a new partner-- image of multiple BDSM toys on pink background

BDSM Basics: Vetting a New Partner

“Vetting a new partner” means making sure they are who they say they are and doing your best to make sure they’re safe. It’s an old school practice in BDSM that gets ignored too...

episode 207 of the Loving BDSM podcast discusses love and D/s relationships

Love and D/s Relationships

Since this episode goes live on Valentine’s Day 2020, we thought it was time to talk about love as it relates to D/s relationships. We’re not offering tips or objective information. These are our...