About us

WHAT DO WE DO ?

We help kinksters like you have happy, healthy power exchange relationships. No matter how you define BDSM and no matter what kind of kinky relationship you want, we’re here to help!

WHO ARE WE ?

We are John Brownstone (the Dom) and Kayla Lords (the sub), a married D/s couple, sharing our thoughts, feelings, and experiences on this thing we call BDSM.

Grow and Learn With Us!

Listen

In our weekly podcast, we discuss all aspects of how to have a happy, healthy power exchange relationship.

Watch

You can watch the podcast during a weekly live stream, plus learn more about BDSM, check out product reviews, and more!

Join

We believe in having a community to help you grow and to offer support on this BDSM journey. Join our kinky community on Patreon!

banner with Loving BDSM logos and text extra help, info, and fun stuff

Feel like a total noob? Don’t know what you don’t know? We offer resources for new kinksters here on our site and a list of resources you can find around the internet. Start with D/s for Beginners and then check out our BDSM resource page.

Still trying to figure out how you feel about D/s, power exchange, and BDSM? Get the 30 Days of D/s workbook to help you think about BDSM in a more manageable way and figure out what YOU want. Buy it here.

Do you like BDSM toys, kinky gear, and fun swag? You can shop John Brownstone’s kinky store at The Kinkery or at the Loving BDSM Etsy shop!

Got a kinky question about D/s relationships, the BDSM community, or something else you’d like to know more about? Ask your question here and it could be answered in a future podcast episode!

Check out the Loving BDSM Blog

We share tips and how-tos, answer BDSM questions, offer our thoughts and insight, share product reviews, and publish the show notes for every podcast episode on our blog! Take a look!

episode 326 of the Loving BDSM podcast discussing people pleasing in power exchange relationships

People Pleasing in Power Exchange

People pleasing happens for a lot of reasons, and it manifests in a lot of ways. We’re talking about it this week, specifically as it relates to power exchange and D/s, based (primarily) on...

episode 325 of the Loving BDSM podcast discussing different types and forms of intimacy in D/s relationships and kink

Different Types of Intimacy in Kink

We’ve talked about intimacy before — link below — but this time, a post on Instagram gave me (Kayla) some specific examples of intimacy beyond the obvious. Also, yes, this is a solo episode...

episode 323 of the Loving BDSM podcast reacting the BDSM reddit questions

BDSM Reddit Reaction

This week, we’re reacting (or responding) to the BDSM questions asked on Reddit! In this episode: Live Stream/Virtual Munch this Friday, September 16! We’re taking next week off. Reacting/responding to BDSM questions from Reddit...

episode 322 of the Loving BDSM podcast

BDSM Q&A

This week, we answered listener questions about a variety of topics: masochism, kinky bucket lists, non-monogamy, and more! In this episode: Our first scene experience Where are all the middles? How do we deal...

episode 321 of the Loving BDSM podcast on voice kinks

Voice Kinks

This week, let’s talk about voice kinks: what are they and do we have any? In this episode: Defining voice kinks What we like about voices Do we have a voice kink? Thanks to...