Consent Is More Than Yes or No in BDSM LB030

5 Responses

  1. jack says:

    As a sexual dominant I use sensation toys like floggers, crops, leather straps, nipple clamps on myself to see how the other person will feel them.

    I draw the line and letting the sub use them on me. I don’t want a sub getting a picture in their head that they can’t get out, and visa versa. We idealize each other and view each other in a certain way. The images we carry in our heads should be consistent. Maybe my sub would get into playing dominant way more than I want to see and could never get the image out of my head, and the other way is even more serious. I don’t ever want the image of me as a sexual submissive to be in someone’s head. It can undermine the foundation of the relationship.

    It is important to know what things feel like. A dom can use the thing in private on themselves to guage the level of sensation it gives. I’ve smacked my self pretty sharply with a leather strap I knew stings. I does sting, but I learned how much time to take between whacks by using it on myself. Same with the flogger. Whip it over my shoulder so it whacks my back. Nipple clamps can be tested too. I didn’t understand why women seemed to have so much sensation on taking them off until I put some on an left them on for a while.

    Doms can get a feel this way but we still have to keep in mind that part of a woman going into the submissive zone can not only increase pain tolerance but becomes sexually arousing and pleasurable.

    I enjoy having the responsibility of reading responses and protecting a woman from real harm.

  1. January 22, 2018

    […] over your partner’s senses is more powerful than you realize. As long as everyone consents, you can add a blindfold to nearly anything you do to heighten everything they […]

  2. October 24, 2018

    […] of BDSM is consent. It’s something you should actively seek throughout your relationship. Consent doesn’t stop once your partner agrees to be your submissive. It’s an ongoing, living, breathing, moving […]

  3. October 29, 2018

    […] Consent is the cornerstone of BDSM. It’s given before you touch, whether it’s a person or their toys. In a public play space, people are very careful about getting consent for everything. Imagine you are surrounded by strangers, you do not want them touching you or your things without your permission. […]

  4. March 13, 2019

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