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External (extrinsic) motivation is about doing something because of outside expectations – your partner set a task, you were asked to do something, etc. It might be something you know needs to be done,...

We’ve experienced “task creep” – the act of taking on tasks/routines that weren’t specifically negotiated. Thankfully for us, we figured it out quickly and worked it out in a quick conversation. But like job...

We don’t know how we’ve made it to 400 full-length episodes, either, but here we are! We didn’t get a lot of questions for this one, so we just sort of chatted until we...

We’re one week away from our 400th episode, so we’re starting the celebration early with a BDSM Reddit response episode! In this episode: Ask your questions for our Monday episodes. We’re celebrating 10,000 subscribers...

Most kinksters aren’t communicating too much, but some of us (like Kayla) could be, so let’s talk about it. In this episode: We need your questions for our Monday episodes. The most common issue...

A submissive has a recurring issue about aftercare with their Dominant partner and wants to know: are they the problem or is it me? Here’s the question: I’ve been dating a dom for about...

We joke about Kayla’s control issues, but they’re definitely a thing we both have to navigate in our power exchange. In this episode: We joke about Kayla’s control issues all the time.  The stereotype...

This week, a submissive is ready to get back to their previous kink life but their partner might not be as ready. Here’s the question: I have a question with no easy answer. I...

Hair pulling inspired this week’s episode – because it was a grounding and/or centering moment in kink. So let’s talk about it. In this episode: Friday night live stream on May 17 starting at...

A submissive needs more commands and strictness from their Dominant to feel the power exchange, but they’re not getting what they need. Here’s the question: My kind sadist seems to be under the impression...