Busting BDSM Myths and Misconceptions

by Kayla Lords · Published May 1, 2020 · Updated November 16, 2020

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:33:16 — 63.3MB)

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This episode is completely inspired by a few Twitter threads/conversations we’ve seen recently, mostly by kink educator Ignixia. She’s been tackling some serious misconceptions in BDSM, and that got us thinking about the things we know people believe — and some of what we used to believe, too.

In this episode:

Reminder: mini-episode, live stream, Discord
Announcement: The Friday podcast episode/live stream will be on hiatus until the week of May 20.
Announcement: The Patreon Live Q&A for May will be rescheduled to some time after our upcoming move.
Safewords/safety
- You always have to have a safe word;
- Safe words are all that matter;
- All you need is safe, sane, and consensual
Dominance
- All Doms are strong
- Doms shouldn’t show emotion;
- Don’t get too attached to your submissive partner
Submission
- All subs are needy;
- Subs must be guided;
- Submission is always sexual;
- Submission is always about serving
BDSM/kinky fuckery
- Must love pain;
- If you’re not into fuckery, you can’t be into power exchange;
- Bondage always involves rope;
- If you don’t love all pain, you can’t call yourself a masochist;
- All Doms are sadists;
- You can’t be a Dom and bottom in kink;
- You can’t be a sub and top in kink
Miscellaneous:
- All Caregiver/little dynamics involve age play;
- I shouldn’t have to tell my Dom anything, they should just know;
- Woman or men are ALWAYS dominant;
- You must have fetishgear, leather, latex to be kinky