About us

WHAT DO WE DO ?

We help kinksters like you have happy, healthy power exchange relationships. No matter how you define BDSM and no matter what kind of kinky relationship you want, we’re here to help!

WHO ARE WE ?

We are John Brownstone (the Dom) and Kayla Lords (the sub), a married D/s couple, sharing our thoughts, feelings, and experiences on this thing we call BDSM.

Grow and Learn With Us!

Listen

In our weekly podcast, we discuss all aspects of how to have a happy, healthy power exchange relationship.

Watch

You can watch the podcast during a weekly live stream, plus learn more about BDSM, check out product reviews, and more!

Join

We believe in having a community to help you grow and to offer support on this BDSM journey. Join our kinky community on Patreon!

banner with Loving BDSM logos and text extra help, info, and fun stuff

Still trying to figure out how you feel about D/s, power exchange, and BDSM? Sign up for 30 Days of D/s, a free email program to help you think about BDSM in a more manageable way and figure out what YOU want. Learn more here.

In 2021, we’re introducing Kinky Book Club and encouraging kinksters who enjoy reading to join in! We’ll alternate between fiction and non-fiction books. Discussions will be videos on our YouTube channel with more conversations happening in our Patron-only Discord server. More info coming soon!

Feel like a total noob? Don’t know what you don’t know? We offer resources for new kinksters here on our site and a list of resources you can find around the internet. Start with D/s for Beginners and then check out our BDSM resource page.

Do you like BDSM toys, kinky gear, and fun swag? You can shop John Brownstone’s kinky store at The Kinkery or buy Loving BDSM merch on Redbubble!

Check out the Loving BDSM Blog

We share tips and how-tos, answer BDSM questions, offer our thoughts and insight, share product reviews, and publish the show notes for every podcast episode on our blog! Take a look!

episode 234 of the Loving BDSM podcast

On Being a Fixer in a D/s Relationship

We’ve mentioned in multiple episodes some of the problems and challenges that happen in any relationship when you’re a “fixer” (as we are). This week, let’s talk about it in more detail! In this...

episode 233 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Reactive, Proactive, and Anticipatory Service

There are multiple ways of talking about submission, power exchange, and service (non-sexual and sexual). In this week’s episode, we take inspiration from a workbook by Luna Carruthers entitled Submissive Reflection: A Journey of...

episode 232 of the Loving BDSM podcast

Letting Hope and Joy Shine In When You Can

This week’s episode was inspired after we went on multiple rants about how much 2020 sucked, and someone said, “Uh, didn’t you buy a house this year? It can’t all suck.” And that’s when...

Assumptions About BDSM, D/s, and Kink

We seem to be on a roll turning old YouTube trends into podcast episodes. Yes, it’s a little strange, but it’s also a lot of fun! This week, we asked our Instagram followers to...

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